President Obama

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Phil pardoned, if briefly. (Image by Lawrence Jackson.)

Phil the Turkey, who was pardoned by President Obama this morning at the White House, was shot and killed later in the day during a meth deal gone wrong outside of Baltimore. You always sucked, Phil. I knew you’d die alone.

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I dreamt that I was riding a very, very pretty pony. (Image by Steve Jurvetson.)

Politico transcribed some tidbits from Ryan Secrest’s interview with President Obama. It was like Frost-Nixon if Frost was a complete douchebag, which he sort of was. Obama revealed his morning wake-up routine. An excerpt:

“[President Obama] confessed he hasn’t been getting much sleep lately and added that he doesn’t have an alarm clock — a White House operator calls to wake him up, ‘and if I don’t wake up the first time, they just keep on calling.'”

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