“We may have a nice convo.”

ANYONE HAVE SWEATY HANDS?

Anyone have sweaty hands all the time? I do. If you do too I’d like to hear of your experience and we may have a nice convo. Thanks.

“Undertones of strawberries.”

Body Fluids (Pee) are Healthy – $25 (Midtown)

In ancient Mediterranean cultures its quite healthy and advised to use human urine as a natural ailment for a variety of illnesses and conditions.In the Western culture many of us turn in vain to antibiotics and other such remedies that truly do not promote health at it’s most natural source. Here, at Organic Pee and Me we are on a mission to restore what many do not know is a natural and preferred means of health and rejuvenation. For you pleasure we offer a variety of tastes,. We recommend you select the taste and nutrient profile that is most beneficial to you based on what may be lacking in your diet. You may select from: 

1. The natural, no preservative added urine of a young, blonde. American, healthy trainer who snacks on fruits, vegetables, brown rice and protein shakes and bars all day. 
2. Or you can select the urine of a beautiful Asian whose natural body chemistry has been described as bitter yet sweet and aromatic. 
3. For those among us who enjoy male urine (which is more full-bodied than female urine) we offer a very special blend of European, Mediterranean with undertones of strawberries. 

Our quality – high. Our supply – fresh. Our prices – competitive.
Bottled right from the source. Naturally Organic.
If you want organic pee- come to me!
Prices negotiable.

“Our quality – high.”

“Was he in depression?”

I thought I had a person for Valentine (learning experience)

We are in our early 60′s. His hot temper / stubbornness caused a lot of problems in the relationship including broken engagement, but we always celebrated the 14th. I just found out he did not even realize the arrival of this year’s V day. Was he in depression? Because he could not lose the 60 pounds he gained in 3 years, the weight starting to affect his health, or a signal for me to move on while I am still trim, fit and youthful looking?

“We are all glad that weirdo moved out.”

I love you and your cute kids

You and your adorable children are a joy to have on our street, in our neighborhood of good people who help and befriend each other. Your love for your children is evident when you play with them in the yard. I love sitting on my deck with a beer and listening to the happy laughter of kids playing. I’m also happy you got some money from your father to make life, bills and raising beautiful children easier. I’m also glad for you that your Dad helped you get a good job.  

If you came to our street you would see the sunshine on the trees, smell barbecue grill smoke, hear a lawn mower and smell that fresh cut grass smell. Kids are playing baseball and Joey is in the driveway with his Mustang, rock music on the radio while he changes the oil. His girlfriend, who has great legs and curly blonde hair, is sitting in a lawn chair with a Diet Coke. We have a wonderful street, with good neighbors. We watch each other’s kids There’s a little old lady without any family in the little white house at the end of the street. Everyone on our street takes turns on the weekend, doing her food shopping for her and our teenage kids do her yard work and household chores on Saturday.

My wife is making her great potato salad….we’re going over to our next door neighbors for a cook out. A bunch of families and their cute kids are coming, everyone brings a dish or dessert, we eat and laugh until it gets dark, then we all go to our houses….on a nice street with good people who work hard, care for each other and have made our street a little piece of Heaven.

We are all glad that weirdo moved out. The one who made no friends and had a sour look on his face all the time. We all tried to be friendly at first, but gave up- there was obviously something really wrong with him, like one of those nasty people who finds no happiness in life. He really didn’t fit in here….

“Pirates.”

Reward for lost photos 1986 – $100 (Staten Island)

“Ever since I purchased them from a gypsy cart in Niagara Falls on June 6, 1996 they have brought me nothing but Strange dreams.”

Haunted Item – Pennies acquired June 6 1996 06/06/06 – $10

Please get these darn pennies out of my house. I hate them. Ever since I purchased them from a gypsy cart in Niagara Falls on June 6, 1996 they have brought me nothing but Strange dreams. They are not bad dreams , however I am weak of heart and cannot tolerate them. I try to get rid of them but they always return to me. I wish to ship them as far away from me as possible. Hence the free worldwide shipping. I am selling them individually as I was told they will always return to the original owner if brought together. Because of this I do apologize that I can only sell one per person. If you are buying for yourself and a friend (because you are either playing a joke or just plain evil) Then please send me both shipping addresses and I will ship them separately.

I must add that I was told by the gypsy that these particular pennies brought fortune to those who had the same birth year as the Penny. I was not fortunate enough to get a penny with my birth year so if you would like one with your birth year please message me and I will see if I have one. No extra charge of course. Thank you all and to those interested please make sure you are tolerate of strange dreams before purchase. I am not accepting returns on these, unless of course they really bother you.

“Will I cheat on him while in Germany? Honestly, yes.”

Advice please? (Madhattan)

Okay so my boyfriend and I are both coke heads. He is 20 years older than me. Jewish. I have German heritage and am going to Germany with a girlfriend of mine. She is paying for everything. So he says if I go were finished. Then he talks about the Holocaust..like all Germans are happy about that. Anyways now he threatened her to me and it wasn’t pretty. He is kinda crazy but so am I! Will I cheat on him while in Germany? Honestly, yes. I am definitely a free spirit. By the way my bf is married! He also shoots heroin and coke. I hate it when he does that because he turns into a paranoid mess! Great huh? What do you think of this? Oh he also has been pressuring me to have sex with him without a condom!! I’ll never do it believe me. 

“…within this 108 thousand-word manuscript…”

The Caller E-book- $1 (Downtown)

Instead of following the pack, this novel is a trendsetter, bustling with fresh ideas, everyday-yet-memorable characters, and a surprise ending that will leave the reader exhilarated. Readers should find the writing style engaging, and the story relevant to the world we all share.

Tonight, Seattle talk show host Jim Sears’ viewing audience would number three million. In the next few days, that number will climb dramatically. That increase will have little to do with Jim’s expertise or his unmarried boss, Linda Sheridon. Rather, it will be fueled by an unnamed caller, who for the next several evenings, would use Jim’s show to touch peoples lives. The FBI enters the fray when some unusual deaths are attributed to the Caller. The plot thickens with a kidnapping and possible links to military involvement. Jim and Linda have to identify and stop the Caller before his final prediction comes to fruition. 

The title of this literary work is The Caller. Many technical details–with a special focus on telecommunications vulnerabilities–within this 108 thousand-word manuscript are from the authors 27-year career as a systems analyst for the Federal Aviation Agency at the Seattle Air Route Traffic Control Center. 

Thanks for Looking.

“I understand the need for discretion.”

Odd Request (queens)

“He smiled a sexy knowing smile, his eyes sinking into her and rummaging into her soul where he didn’t belong.”

THE CHOSEN ONE (EBOOK) – $3 (Amazon)

Dressed in his white flowing robes edged in an intricate gold threaded pattern, he was an author’s Arabian night’s gallant and her illicit fantasy. With all of the courage she could muster, Sarah held his gaze with a challenge attempting to quell her inner chaos. 

“At last you come, Chosen One. I have waited without patience.” His deep quiet voice and exotic accent framed vividly the fleeting memories of her dreams. I have searched for you for such a very long time.” 

The accuracy of his words struck raw fear in her heart sending her on the immediate attack. “Are we on that again? — Excuse me sir, if I seem rude, but my name is Sarah . . . Sarah Hope . . . I don’t really go by Chosen One.” The heavy veil muffled the effect of her words. 

He smiled a sexy knowing smile his eyes sinking into her and rummaging into her soul where he didn’t belong. “Sarah Hope, yes I know your name, it is very beautiful and fitting for you. Why do you suppose your mother named you this name?”

“She said that I was born for a reason,” Sarah said, instantly regretting her words for she was certain it would only play into his crazy notions about her. He smiled again and nodded. “Indeed, your mother was quite correct. You are The Chosen One, and that is the reason you were born.”

Sarah groaned. “You have got to be kidding, that sounds like something out of a bad movie.”

“Yet, you know I speak the truth.” 

“I don’t think my mother ever believed anyone would make a connection between “Sarah” and the “Chosen One.”

His eyes shaded with burning force. “Do you know what Sarah means in Hebrew?”

Sarah felt her thoughts come to a halt from the ironic religious inconsistency of his question. “What does an Arab know, or care about a Hebrew name?”

“Are you Jewish?” His voice was a concentrated whisper as if he had only just considered at this moment the possibility.

“I am a Catholic.”

He nodded, holding her with his radiant eyes. “Ah yes, of course.” Then he smiled. “Little better, but perfectly ironic.”

“Would you still think I was the Chosen One even if I was Jewish?” 

He shrugged his smile. “You are the Chosen One, if you were Jewish, we would have dealt with that problem just as we will deal with you being a Catholic. Though I admit, it is an easier problem.” Sarah tucked her hair behind her ear, her thoughts racing. “So what does Sarah mean in Hebrew?”

“Princess.”

The word stood alone in the air. Like a word game show the words “Prince” and “Princess” stood together on an imaginary scrabble game.

Sarah laughed nervously. “Really? How coincidental.” 

The man was obviously crazy. Perhaps too much inbreeding had occurred in the Saudi royal family. “Well, I guess for today I am The Chosen One because you chose me to come and dance. That is all fine as long as you understand I am only chosen to dance and nothing else, we will be just fine with each other,” she said firmly. “And I am ready to dance, if you will just show me where I need to get started.”

His smile disappeared and silence covered the room. Sarah scanned the sober faces that surrounded her while her fear escalated from 0 to 60. “Was it something I said? I mean, that is why you hired me despite your insane notions, so you should not look so shocked.”

Vassar’s intense eyes captured and held her even while he waved his hand gesturing the others leave the room. All exited quickly and quietly except three body guards who stepped back into the far corners of the room. “Sarah, surely you must presume why you are truly here.” 

“And it is not to dance,” he added, his voice dropping husky.

“It came to me like a massive tsunami.”

PARTNER WANTED – I’ll Make You Famous (Financial District)

“It sends out a strange beeping noise just before it passes by.”

Are the subway cars crashing anyone else?

I’ve noticed with the newer subway cars on the track, it sends out a strange beeping noise just before it passes by. This noise actually happens at just about the same time my computer crashes or the TV freezes. I was wondering if anyone else has noticed this intrusion of the MTA equipment.