"Some bad man has kidnapped him."

As an Italian-American, I can confirm that there is simply nothing more humorous than an 1890’s Italian organ grinder who treats his monkey like a member of the family. And it’s not just a matter of opinion–science has proven this to be true. I came across this star-crossed tale of Giovanni and his disappeared simian in the October 11, 1899 issue of the Brooklyn Daily Eagle. An excerpt:

“Somewhere in the city to-day is a kidnapped monkey and a stolen hand organ, says the Philadelphia Bulletin. Giovanni Luirgi will not allow the word ‘stolen’ to be applied to the monk. In telling of his loss to the police at the Germantown station house the Italian said: ‘He was my child, my brother, my only friend. He was more than a monkey. I could understand his speech. Some bad man has kidnapped him.’ Giovanni lives in East Chelten avenue, in a neighborhood known as Sicily. He locked up his monkey and organ in a shed at night, and in the morning they had disappeared, together with his dream of showers of dimes. The Italian does not know whom to suspect, but he feels sure that the monkey did not run away with the organ on his own account.”