Old Print Articles

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Electricians in the 19th century didn’t always display the best decision-making abilities, as evidenced by the following trio of articles published in the Brooklyn Daily Eagle.

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“Tested Currents With His Tongue” (June 26, 1892): “The death of Arthur J. Yeo, an electrician, 27 years old, of 2,181 Eight-Avenue, New York, was reported at the health department of that city yesterday. The cause of death was given as nervous apoplexy. Yeo died yesterday morning. The undertaker who filed the certificate said that Yeo had been killed by electricity. He was in the habit of testing currents by applying the wires to his tongue, and the electricity taken into his system by this means resulted in the nervous apoplexy which caused his death.”

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“Quinine Had No Effect On Him” (March 28, 1888): “Paul Grieshnber, a barber and electrician, of Stapleton, S.I., was arrested yesterday in New York, for being drunk and disorderly. He said he was sick and took twenty grains of quinine, but without effect. Then he took schnapps, which had too much effect upon him. Grieshnber had a copy of the Anarchists’ paper, the Freiheil, and Most’s “On the Art of Making Bombs.” In the Essex Market Police Court to-day he was fined $10.”

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“Gibson May Live To Get Married” (June 22, 1888): “George H. Gibson, the electrician who shot himself night before last, just before his marriage was to take place, because his tailor disappointed him, is not dead, as reported, and may recover.”

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Civilization was encroaching on the Wild West in the 1890s, as cowboys began to trade their trusted steeds for bicycles. At least that’s what was reported in the December 18, 1895 edition of the Brooklyn Daily Eagle. An excerpt:

“Kansas and Texas cowboys are now using bicycles in herding, rounding up and driving cattle to pasture, corral or barn. As a lively broncho has more double cussedness bound up in his diminutive carcass than any other animal in existence, the use of the wheel in its stead will destroy the romance which distance lends to the festive cowboy. Imagine a long haired, leather-breeched, sombreroed cowboy, guns, cartridge belt. etc.; cavorting across prairie, canyon and divide, in the effort to round up or rope a frisky long horn or cut out marketable steers from the bunch. Then when the Mescalero, Chiricahua and Yaqui Apache, the hereditary foes of the cowboy, are compelled to steal the bicycles instead of the ponies of the cow punchers, the demoralization of the trail, round-up and drive will have been complete.”

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“Bucking Broncho,” 1894:

"Its owner had taught it to fire a pistol while galloping on the back of a dog."

The most ridiculous thing I have ever read was published in the June 29, 1889 edition of the Brooklyn Daily Eagle. The story in full:

“A correspondent writing to a Paris contemporary from Montriebard, in the department of Lois et Cher, says: ‘A learned monkey named Bertran was deeply attached to its owner, who among other tricks, had taught it to fire a pistol while galloping on the back of a dog. The master of the animal, it seems, lately met with certain domestic troubles and, in a dejected frame of mind a few days ago, he sent a bullet through his head, death being instantaneous. The monkey was present at the death of his master, and probably took in every particular. In any case,when a doctor was called in to see if life was extinct in the man he was astonished to find himself in presence of a double suicide, the monkey’s body being stretched beside that of his master, with the revolver being clasped between his fingers. It is stated that the animal picked up the pistol after his master had blown out his brains, and imitated what he had just seen done, sending a bullet through his head precisely as the man had done.'”

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A writer waltzes into a Paris hospital and asks a doctor to act incredibly unethically and the medico eagerly complies, as reported in an article in the February 1, 1893 issue of the Brooklyn Daily Eagle, which was originally published in the Pall Mall Gazette. An excerpt:

“The other day I wanted to include in a page of fiction a realistic description of the agonies that a starving person undergoes before death puts an end to the suffering. I had consulted several doctors and obtained from them statements of the symptoms preceding death from starvation. Still, I felt a description based on such information was wanting in certain particulars and could not well be put into the mouth of a supposed sufferer. Suddenly it occurred to me to go to the Hospital de la Charite, and beg the doctors attached to the Clinique Hypnotherapique to hypnotize one of the patients, to suggest that she was starving, and then to allow me to write down the sensations experienced by the subject as she described them. I called at the hospital unexpectedly and explained the object of my visit. The doctor smiled, and without a word sent for a patient, who was immediately put into a hypnotic state. Nothing passed between the doctor and the subject before she was hypnotized.

It was then suggested to her that she had been without food for many days and was actually starving. The patient soon showed signs of great suffering and distress and at the doctor’s invitation described the sensations she felt. I was astounded. A symptom that I had noticed in scores of cases among the starving Russian peasants last winter was described by the hypnotized woman with a physical movement familiar to me, although I had entirely forgotten it, and my attention had not been called to it by any medical man consulted.

The patient was taken by suggestion progressively through the stages of starvation as far as was safe  and was afterward brought back to a normal state on it being suggested to her that she had swallowed nourishing food. Still, it was some time before the food she had taken in imagination seemed to benefit her; she persisted in declaring that it caused her a great deal more bodily pain than the pangs of hunger. Dr. Jules Luys, member of the Academy of Medicine, the eminent professor at the Charite, was greatly interested in the result of this experiment, which was carried out for me under the observation of Dr. Encausse, his chief of the laboratory. He told me afterwards that he had known this woman for many years and was sure that she had not suffered from hunger.”

"The chief subjects we wish to elucidate concern the brain and the nerves."

Even in the 19th century, conducting medical experiments on criminals was generally frowned upon. But not by everyone, as evidenced by an article from the October 21, 1886 edition of the Brooklyn Daily Eagle, which was originally published in the Chicago Journal. An excerpt:

“In a conversation that I had recently with a prominent Chicago physician, he was bemoaning the prejudice that existed against vivisection autopsies, and all the means by which the medical profession acquires its knowledge of the human body and its skill in relieving human suffering. ‘What we need now,’ he said, ‘is a legal enactment turning over criminals convicted of heinous capital offenses to the medical fraternity for experimentation on the vital forces. Of course I never expect to see this done. The sentimentalists would rather see a million good people languish and die for want of medical skill than to see one cutthroat like Frank Rand subjected to surgical operations which would prove fatal. The truth is that this would be less liable to the charge of inhumanity than the vivisection of the lower animals. It would pain me exceedingly to have a dog subjected to torture, because the dog is an innocent and affectionate animal, whereas some of the men we now hang deserve a worse fate. Then, too, we would not have to keep up the practice for years. If there were only a law turning over the worst capital criminals of the year 1886 to us for the purpose, the benefit to suffering humanity could not be estimated. The chief subjects we wish to elucidate concern the brain and the nerves.”

"She put a broom in it with a man's hat on top and a man's trousers in front. It was shocking."

A legal case of great national importance, involving a couple of ninnies, was covered in the June 10, 1887 Brooklyn Daily Eagle. An excerpt: 

“Miss Monaghan, a delicate refined looking lady, dressed in black, called at Justice Rhinehardt’s court this morning, in company with another lady, evidently her sister, and sought the magistrate’s advice as to how she should proceed in order to abate what she termed a nuisance. The lady, who is over 30 years old, resides in the dwelling 30 South Eleventh Street, and next door is a tenement in which Mrs. Murphy lives.

‘I have been,’ said Miss Monaghan to the magistrate, ‘in rather delicate health for a short time and my physician ordered me to sit in the yard where the sun’s warm rays could reach me. I obeyed instructions. From my position in the yard I had to face Mrs. Murphy’s windows. The latter annoyed me a good deal in consequence. She never ceased in throwing all kinds of missiles and refuse into my yard. The nuisance became so great that I was unable to stand it and wrote her a polite note, asking her if had injured her in any way and expressing my willingness to apologize if I had. I asked her also to call upon me but she did not. She continued annoying me and placed all manner of things in her windows which I could not avoid seeing.’

‘What did she place in the windows?’ asked the magistrate.

‘She put a broom in it with a man’s hat on top and a man’s trousers in front. It was shocking. Well, I tried to settle the matter in some way and have the annoyance stopped. I belong to Father Malone’s church and so does Mrs. Murphy. I waited upon the priest, but he said that Mrs. Murphy had not spoken to him about the matter. I came, to you, Judge, as a last resort.’

Clerk Schleuter, at the Magistrate’s suggestion, addressed Mrs. Murphy a note requesting her to cease her annoyance of Miss Monaghan or a warrant would be issued against her.”

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"Like Denzer he was a hopeless lunatic." (Image by Klaus with K.)

The Lunacy Commission of 19th-century New York had its hands full with the Ward’s Island Insane Asylum, since the guards were especially brutal and the patients exceedingly troubled, as evidenced by the following stories about the facility which were published in the Brooklyn Daily Eagle.

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“A Greenpoint Man Says Rag Soup Was Served To The Inmates” (June 26, 1894): “The state lunacy commission resumed its investigations into the condition of the insane poor on Ward’s and Blackwell’s Islands this morning in the Park Avenue Hotel, New York.

Henry P. Bradley of 1,544 Broadway, manager of a grocery firm, who spent several months in 1891 in Ward’s Island Asylum, testified to repeated acts of cruelty on the part of the attendants. John McSweeney, a resident of Greenpoint and an attendant at Ward’s Island in 1891 and 1892, testified to irregularities in the asylum, such as allowing patients to bathe in the same water and to the serving of soup which contained pieces of muslin and clothing to the patients.”

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"...and to the serving of soup which contained pieces of muslin and clothing to the patients."

“One Ward’s Island Inmate Brains Another” (April 26, 1880): “Charles Denzer, an inmate of the Ward’s Island Lunatic Asylum, murdered Terrence Shields, another patient, on Friday, in a fit of sudden violence. Denzer is a miner. In 1971, immediately after his arrival in this country he was sent to the emigrant asylum, and in 1874 was transferred at Ward’s Island, where he has remained since. Shields was by trade a plasterer. Like Denzer he was a hopeless lunatic. Previous to 1865 he lived at  No. 850 Washington St, New York. In that year he was sent to Blackwell’s Island Insane Asylum, and in the fifteen years he has spent there and on Ward’s Island his friends have gradually lost sight of him and left him to his fate. Both men were considered quiet and harmless. Though Denzer had twice attempted to take his own life, he never made any demonstrations of hostility toward other patients.

On Friday morning, as the men were about to begin the day’s work, Keeper Thomas Keenan called Denzer and asked him to take from a closet next to the pantry a long and heavy window stick, which he wanted to use. Denzer went to obey the order. Shields sat by the door of the closet reading, and held it open until Denzer came out. His head was bent, and he did not observe Denzer, who, without a word, lifted the heavy stick and brought it down upon his head with great force.”

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“An Inventor Goes Insane” (December 8, 1895): “George E. Fleet, an inventor, of 77 Roosevelt Street, New York, was sent to Ward’s Island Insane Asylum yesterday. Fleet went crazy trying to invent a patent bottle which, when emptied of its contents, could not be refilled.”

Camels didn’t always thrive in 19th-century America, but people kept trying to integrate them into life in the U.S.  In fact, according to the first of the three stories below from the Brooklyn Daily Eagle, the beasts were used by the United States Postal Service in the 1850s to deliver mail on the Great Plains.

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“The Camels Are Coming” (April 2, 1856): “The camel experiment over the plains (for mail and other transport), for which Congress made appropriation two years ago, will soon be tried. The camels are now en route from Asia Minor. The whole number is 33, viz: 9 male and 15 female camels; 4 male and 5 female dromedaries. The vessel and this cargo is expected to arrive in Texas about that time. Several of the animals are presents from the Viceroy of Egypt.”

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“Three Camels on the Bridge” (July 26, 1883): “This morning about four o’clock, three camels, on their way from Coney Island to Central Park, were being driven across the bridge by three young lads. When near the New York tower the camels got frightened and ran away, but Officer Dooley, who was stationed at the New York entrance, seeing the animals approach at a furious rate, closed the gates and thus captured them. One of the boys was knocked down and kicked by one of the animals, but his injuries did not prevent him from proceeding on his journey. These are the first camels that have crossed the bridge, and it seems rather unfortunate that their initial trip should have been attended with this little accident. Officer Dooley says that as long as he lives he should never forget the sight that these beasts presented as they ran at full speed toward him. It had been such a long time since he saw a camel and it being the last beast on earth that he expected to meet on the bridge, he said that they almost scared him out of his senses.”

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“Baby Camel Wears Boots” (July 23, 1902): “The baby camel born in Central Park several months ago was provided with a new pair of leather boots this morning by Superintendent Smith. The camel of of the double hump species, and is one of three of the species in the Park menagerie. When it was born Superintendent Smith discovered that the animal’s forelegs were very weak–so weak, in fact, that the camel was unable to stand up unless it stood on the ankle joints.”

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Camel ride, Luna Park, Coney Island, 1903:

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Magicians used to take the name of a famous predecessor, bastardize it slightly, and pay homage to their forebearer while placing themselves in a continuum. Harry Houdini, born Ehrich Weiss, took his name from the famed French magus Jean Eugène Robert-Houdin. At one point, the Frenchman was supposedly assigned by his government the odd task of traveling to Algeria and using his hocus-pocus to influence so-called Arab tribes away from the guidance of Islamic leaders (or “marabouts,” as they are referred to in the piece.) An excerpt about this deeply ethnocentric (and largely fictional) story from an awkwardly written piece in the November 7, 1857 Brooklyn Daily Eagle, which originally appeared in the London Times:

“Every one has seen or heard speak of Robert Houdin. Besides being the prince of conjurers he is an able mathematician and mechanician, and his electric clock, made for the Hotel de Ville of his native town of Blois, obtained a medal of the Paris exhibition. It is not generally known that he was sent to Algeria by the French Government, on a mission connected with the Black Art–probably the first time that a conjurer has been called upon to exercise his profession in government employ. Some details of his expedition have been published. Its object was to destroy the influence exercised among the Arab tribes by the marabouts–an influence often mischievously applied. By a few clumsy tricks and impostures these marabouts pass themselves off as sorcerers; no one it was thought, was better able to eclipse their skill and discredit their science than the man of inexhaustible bottles.

One of the greatest pretensions of the marabouts was to invulnerability. At the moment that a loaded musket was fired at him, amd the trigger pulled, he pronounced a few cabalistic words, and the weapon did not go off. Houdin detected the trick, and showed that the touchhole was plugged. The Arab wizard was furious and abused the French rival.

‘You may revenge yourself,’ quietly remarked Houdin, ‘take a pistol, load it yourself; here are bullets, put one in the barrel, but before doing so mark it with your knife.’ The Arab did as he was told.

"A fanatical marabout had agreed to give himself up to the sorcerer."

‘You are quite certain, now,’ said Houdin, ‘that the pistol is loaded and will go off. Tell me, do you feel no remorse in killing me thus, notwithstanding that I authorize!’

‘You are my enemy,’ cooly replied the Arab, ‘I will kill you.’ Without replying, Houdin struck an apple on the point of a knife, and calmly gave the word to fire.

The pistol was discharged, the apple flew far away, and there appeared in its place, stuck on the point of the knife, the bullet the marabout had marked.

The spectators remained mute from stupefaction; the marabout bowed before his superior; ‘Allah is great,’ he said, ‘I am vanquished.’ Instead of the bottle from which, in Europe, Robert Houdin pours an endless stream of every description of wine and liquor, he called for an empty bowl, which he kept continually full of boiling coffee, but few of the Arabs would taste it, for they made sure that they came from the devil’s own coffee pot. He told them that it was in his power to deprive them of all strength and to restore it to them at will, and he produced a small box, so light that a little child could lift it with its finger; but it suddenly became so heavy that the strongest man present could not life it, and the Arabs, who prize physical strength above everything. looked with terror at the great magician who, they doubted not, could annihilate them by the mere exertion of his will. They expressed this belief; Houdin confirmed them in it, and promised that on a day appointed, he would convert one of them into smoke. The day came; the throng was prodigious; a fanatical marabout had agreed to give himself up to the sorcerer. They made him stand upon a table and covered him with a transparent gause; then Houdin and another person lifted the table by the two ends, and the Arab disappeared in the cloud of smoke.

The terror of the spectators was indescribable; they rushed out of the place and run a long distance before some of the boldest thought of returning to look after the marabout. They found him near the place where he had been evaporated; but he could tell them nothing, and was like a drunken man, ignorant of what had happened to him. Thenceforward Houdin was venerated and the marabouts despised; the object of the French Government was completely attained.”

"He distinctly felt the end of the sword blade strike the spoon and for several days could feel it gradually changing its course toward his stomach."

An Ohio sword swallower did his stomach no favors when he downed a spoon on a bet, as recorded in the following article from the August 9, 1887 Brooklyn Daily Eagle, which was a reprint from the Cincinnati Commerical Gazette.

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“A most remarkable and successful surgical operation was performed upon one of the male patients of the Cincinnati Hospital, Sunday morning last, by Dr. F.W. Walker, of 66 West Eighth Street, who was assisted by Surgeon John A. Murphy and several of the interns of the hospital corps. On July 16 a young man of medium build, who registered as Andrew S. Driver, aged 22, and residing at 61 Pierson Street for three months past, entered the hospital. He was almost bent double, and walked with great difficulty, and in answer to questions stated that he was suffering from most agonizing pains in the stomach.

For several years he has been traveling with shows about the country as a fakir, and performing the sword swallowing feat. About four years ago, while giving a performance in one of the smaller towns in the northern part of the State, he was bantered by a number of spectators who thought the sword he swallowed was worked by springs, and they dared him to go through the same act with an ordinary case knife. In this he was successful, and a number made up a purse and wagered him quite a sum that he could not swallow an ordinary teaspoon.

He accepted their challenge, and picking up a treble plated teaspoon of Rogers’ manufacture slowly placed it in his mouth and swallowed it. He after that continued the sword act, feeling no ill effects from the spoon until about six months ago, when, during one of his performances, he distinctly felt the end of the sword blade strike the spoon and for several days could feel it gradually changing its course toward his stomach. Yet all the while he had experienced no painful sensation. Some two weeks later, however, he was attacked with violent cramps and pains, beginning in his right side and afterward changing the course of the stomach in the immediate neighborhood of the navel. These attacks were only periodical at first, but became gradually more frequent, and finally he concluded to come to Cincinnati for treatment. 

Arriving here he had a more favorable turn and remained most of the time about home until the date mentioned, when he was again attacked in a more violent form than at any previous time. He then concluded to seek medical aid and to that end entered the hospital for treatment. He was closely questioned and placed under a rigid examination, but owing to the excessive hot weather and the delicacy with which his case would necessarily have to  be handled., the surgeons thought it advisable to defer the operation until the weather became more favorable. He was informed Sunday morning that in order to extract the spoon from his stomach a very delicate and yet severe surgical operation would have to be performed, and accordingly during the early morning hours of that day he was placed under the influence of the anaesthetic and the operation began.

Dr. Walker skillfully handled the knife and opened the stomach a trifle below the navel, where, toward the right side, imbedded in the intestines, was found first the handle of the spoon, and working the finger along through the growth the bell part of the spoon was reached and the spoon removed intact from the patient. The intestines were placed carefully back and the wound dressed and sewed up, the patient during the operation giving hardly any indication of pain. During Sunday, after recovering from the effects of the anaesthetic administered, he complained of pain and was quite restless, but during yesterday seemed to be recovering nicely, and last night, when the hospital was visited, he was resting easily.”

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Human Ostrich Dines on Too Fast on Hardware. (1904)

 

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"But she is positive one of them is killed."

In the days before telegraph and Morse code let alone radio, information about events that occurred in Europe wouldn’t reach America for several days. Newspapers in New York came up with a solution–get a jump on the competition by having a clairvoyant tell them what happened. This could have been some sort of joke, but I don’t think so. An excerpt from a story in the April 19, 1860 Brooklyn Daily Eagle:

“The New York Daily News has been consulting a clairvoyant on the result of  the Prize Fight which all suppose to have been fought by Heenan and Sayers on Monday, and says:

‘A clairvoyant in this city declares that one of the pugilists who yesterday fought for the championship of England has been killed. We have been unable to ascertain which; but the lady inclines to think it is the ‘larger man,’ whether as to the muscle or as to the pugilistic fame we know not. But she is positive one of them is killed. We are, therefore, all the more curious to know the result. It will affect either spiritual seeing or material hitting; which, a few days will tell. The old lady adds that the killed man is not the winner.”

"He made the statement that he was 'the first born,' and that all who wished to be saved must gain salvation through him."

In 19th-century America, street preachers were often attended by riots and fisticuffs, as the following stories published in in the Brooklyn Daily Eagle clearly demonstrate.

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“Conviction of a Street Preacher” (November 26, 1855): “Hugh Kirkland, a notorious foul-mouthed street preacher was fine $10 in Cincinnati recently for using ‘bawdy, lewd and filthy language,’ there being a statute against such indecency in force in that city. About a dozen witnesses were examined for the State, who testified that he made use of language during his discourse the most foul and libidinous in its character, and which would be entirely too obscene for publication. He defended his own case and declared himself a victim of the Democratic Party.”

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“Arrested for Blasphemy” (May 15, 1895): “In Kansas City, Kan., last night, John Gabriel, in white trousers and white jacket, aroused a crowd of spectators almost to the lynching point by declaring himself to be a second Jesus Christ. He commenced to preach in the court house square. He made the statement that he was ‘the first born,’ and that all who wished to be saved must gain salvation through him. Cries of ‘Lynch him,’ ‘String up the blasphemer,’ and other like exclamations were heard on all sides, while the crowd moved in upon him, Gabriel was unmoved and calmly surveying the crowd continued to speak. At this juncture three policemen appeared and quickly started Gabriel toward the station house. The crowd soon recovered from its spell and pressed closely after the quartet. For a long time it seemed doubtful which would be victorious but the officers by hard work and considerable threatening finally landed Gabriel in the station house. Gabriel is 35 years old and claims to come from Cedar County, Ia. He says he will continue his assertions made to-night. If he does serious trouble is feared.”

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"Some of those arrested were Wide Awakes, who had been guilty of overt acts."

“Street Preaching–Riots and Assaults” (September 4, 1854): “Yesterday afternoon, as usual, several street preachers held forth on the Battery and from the steps of City Hall, N.Y.; and about 5 o’clock, a large party of Wide Awakes, who had been listening to a preacher on the Battery started in procession of the Park, attended by some policemen, but as they were emerging from one of the gates of the Battery a party of Irish rushed upon them with knives, pistols, etc., and in a moment James Wood, a peacable citizen was dangerously stabbed in the left shoulder and side. About a dozen pistol shots were fired by either party, but fortunately, but one man was injured. His name could not be ascertained as his friends bore him quickly away. The police and Wide Awakes finally succeeded in scattering the Irish and then marched up to the Park, but the Irish had again formed, and on reaching the Park commenced a series of assaults and running fights.

The police soon succeeded in clearing the steps of the City Hall of the thousands on and about them, and the preacher, with a part of the crowd, proceeded up Broadway, he preaching as they walked. Another party started up Chatham Street, and still another down Centre Street, in all of which there was more or less fighting. As the day closed, the parties finally dispersed, the police having arrested seven persons, all of whom were locked up by Justice Osborne for examination. Some of those arrested were Wide Awakes, who had been guilty of overt acts. Mr. Wood, the person who was stabbed, was conveyed to his residence, No. 304 Eighth Avenue.”

"Her mamma taught her the part of Little Buttercup when she was about 5 years old."

Long before moving pictures “normalized” the idea of children entertainers like Jackie Coogan and Shirley Temple, there were half-pints on stage who drew audiences and criticism. One of the first was “Little Corinne,” a sassy singer and actor, who some feared was being corrupted by show business. She probably was. Of course, there were children all over the country who were impoverished and being completely ignored while the Corinne case was being argued vociferously. An excerpt from a story about Corinne in the November 30, 1881 New York Times:

“A handsome, dark-complexioned little girl, quick of movement and vivacious in manner, was taken before Judge Donohue, in Supreme Court, yesterday, by Mr. E. Fellows Jenkins, the Superintendent of the Society for the Preservation of Cruelty to Children. She was well dressed and in every respect looked like the child of loving and wealthy parents. Accompanying her and her custodian was a stout, good-looking woman, who wore a silk circular lined with fur. The child clung to this woman, and gave every evidence that she loved her. Mr. Eldridge T. Gerry, President of the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children, informed the court that the child was the little actress and singer known as ‘Corinne.’ He said that his society had taken charge of her because, being only 9 years old, she was ‘unlawfully exhibited and employed’ in dancing, singing, and acting on the theatrical stage. The authority for her arrest was an order of the court, based upon a petition of the society averring that ‘Corinne’ was thus unlawfully employed by Jennie Kimball, or Flaherty, who was neither her lawful guardian nor a fit person to have control of her, or to be intrusted with her education. It was the intention of Jennie Kimball, it was averred, to exhibit ‘Corinne’ at the Metropolitan Casino in plays in which she will be compelled to sing and dance, and prior to which she will have to commit to memory large portions of plays. All these things are alleged to be detrimental to the proper physical and mental development of the child, who is of remarkable beauty and of a quick, nervous, and excitable temperament. It is also averred that Corinne’s parents are dead, and that she has no natural or legal guardian.

"I gave it ti mamma to save; what else would I do with it?"

Mrs. Flaherty avowed that she had had the custody of the child ever since she was 2 years old, and that ‘Corinne’s’ mother appointed her as guardian. She asserted that it pleased the child to learn her lines and music, and that Corinne was in excellent health, that she walks every pleasant day, and has a maid, and a carriage and horses to ride whenever she chooses.

The inquiry into the circumstances of the child was then begun. Corinne was the first witness and she gave her testimony in a clear and interesting manner. She said she would be 10 years old next Christmas. She had known her mamma (Mrs. Flaherty) a very long time, but she could not tell how long. Her mamma taught her the part of Little Buttercup when she was about 5 years old, and she played in Boston a long time. She liked to sing and act, and she did not get tired, although she was often called out by the audience. Once a big ship, in which was $1,500, was presented to her. She was asked by Mr. Gerry what she did with the money, and she answered sharply:

‘I gave it to mamma to save; what else would I do with it?’

She said that she wanted to play in the Metropolitan Casino. ‘All the other little girls are allowed to play,’ she said petulantly, ‘and I am not. I don’t think that is right.’ As Corinne declared that she was tired, the examination was adjourned until noon to-day. The child was much distressed at being separated from Mrs. Flaherty and at the fear of being taken to prison. She was finally reassured, and went away to the house of Superintendent Jenkins, accompanied by her maid and her dog Fritz.”

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"Some surgical operations on the brain result in increasing the intelligence of the patient."

Neurosurgery was a brave new world in the 19th century, and the Brooklyn Daily Eagle greeted its dawning with its usual shaky grasp on facts. An excerpt from an article in the October 13, 1895 issue:

“It is only in the late years that surgeons have operated on the brain. They can remove a pistol ball from the brain where, as in some cases, it has lodged without fatal results, and send the patient about his business in less than two weeks’ time. A quarryman by the premature explosion of a blast had a drill driven through his head, piercing his brain through and through. A successful surgical operation was performed upon him.

Some surgical operations on the brain result in increasing the intelligence of the patient. An eminent expert in brain surgery in this country (Dr. Kean of Philadelphia) made a particularly successful operation on an epileptic boy of 16 who in ten years had 5,000 fits. An extraneous growth of nearly an ounce was removed from the right parietal region. Another expert has predicted that in course of time operations of the brain will be performed for the relief of apoplexy and epilepsy, and that such operations will be successful. A few years ago there was a little girl patient in one of the hospitals of Paris. She exhibited an almost utter absence of intelligence. She had a mournful look, lackluster eyes and could not be aroused even to take an interest in dolls. She breathed with difficulty in consequence of the thorax having stopped its development, and her brain had ceased to grow at an early age owing to the premature coalescence of the bones in infancy. The surgeon Lannelongue attributed her unfortunate condition to the narrowness of the cranial box, and believed that if more space were given to the brain her idiocy would disappear and she would attain a normal existence. The operator who had previously experimented on dead children in studying the same trouble made a long and narrow incision in the middle of the skull, and on the left side, which was more depressed than the right, removed a substance of tissue bone nine centimeters long by six millimeters broad. The dura matter, which is in the exterior envelop of the brain, was not touched, and the superficial wound was united by the skin again. Within three weeks after the operation there was a remarkable change in the child; she walked, smiled and became interested in all  that was going on around her. An operation exactly parallel to this was performed by an American surgeon in Cincinnati; in this case the child was much younger, but the operation was completely successful.

Another singular case was that of a housemaid employed in a New York family. She began to show signs of exceptional stupidity; so much that she became unable properly to attend to her duties. One of the first things the girl did was to visit a New York hospital on a friendly call to her sister, who was employed in the institution. The discharged servant had often complained of having severe headaches. A young physician in the hospital, hearing her speak of her trouble, made an examination of her head and found that the bones of her skull had never knitted together. A surgeon operated on her head and succeeded in closing the aperture. Only a few days after the operation the girl became as bright as she had ever been, was taken back by her former employer, where she was soon recognized as one of the most accomplished housemaids.”

"It appears that in that city the public takes its steaks in capsules of concentrated beef."

The only way to explain the following August 28, 1899 old print article is that either people in Indianapolis were taking their dinner in pill form or editors at the Brooklyn Daily Eagle were taking their lunch in liquid form. More likely the latter. An excerpt:

“Capsule banquets? Well, hardly! The idea of sitting around a table in company, taking pills and bursting into song, quip and jest and eloquence over a pellet! What are the scientists trying to do? Drive all the gayety out of the world? Such is the horrible possibility disclosed by way they dine in Indianapolis. It appears that in that city the public takes its steaks in capsules of concentrated beef–little capsules no bigger than a quinine pill. All that the hotel keeper has to furnish with it is a glass of water and a crumb of salt. Then they take a little powder which used to be a potato and toss that down, and if a regular table d’hote dinner as required a compressed tomato for salad and a little thing that looks like a bean, but is really a whole mince pie, is swallowed, and after that a demitasse follows of about the size of a homeopathic pill.

This kind of thing may do for Indianapolis and other Western cities where people are so busy making money and politics that they would forget to eat if they did not have their dinners in their pockets and have alarm clocks that went off warningly at the time to take them. But we can say to Indianapolis right now that she need not look for any outside endorsements of her persnickety practices. When we eat we do so not merely to sustain life, but because, when the right sort of victuals are afforded, it is fun to eat. We like to eat in company and bandy remarks across the table and up and down the length of it, and we like to wash down every course with colored liquids that look as if they were drawn from the jars and bottles that druggists keep in their windows, but are different. We are especially anxious as to those liquids. If in an emergency we consented to take our steaks in pellets and eat our soup dry in one tiny mouthful, are we supposed to take champagne and other mineral waters in a mustard spoon? Shall we quaff out Chateau Yquem and our Pontet Canet in single drops that would get lost between our tongue tips and our throats?

Why, the mere anxiety of keeping track of the potables in a dinner like that would offset all the possible pleasure to be had out of the banquet. Suppose a waiter were accidentally to stuff a couple of cases of Chablis into his vest pocket while he was gathering a service of fried chicken out of a pill box, and spill all the wine! Where would he then be and where would be the dinner? No sirs. We prefer to believe that stomachs were given to us in order to do work, and we do not thank the scientists who are trying to persuade us that all of our waking hours should be diverted from dinner and refreshments and devoted to labor and Lofty Thought. If this is all that science intends to do for us, down with science! Meantime, let us keep putting down pudding and cocktails and a lot of other joys.”

"He proposed that the ceremony be performed by phonograph."

The record player was initially a disappointing technology, but one nineteenth-century Brooklyn undertaker found use for it during an unusual funeral. An excerpt about the odd ceremony from an August 18, 1895 article in the Brooklyn Daily Eagle:

“Undertaker Stillwell of Gravesend has at last achieved his desire and held a funeral with the services conducted by a phonograph. In spite of its novelty there was nothing indecorous about the circumstances and in fact the mourners were visibly affected.

Augusta Burr, a baby of 16 months, who had been posing in a Coney Island museum as a freak, she being the size of a child of 5, and weighing ninety-three pounds, was in perfect health until Monday. She began to suffer from her teeth and then pneumonia set in. Thursday she died.

Mr. Stillwell was given charge of the funeral. As the relatives were non-residents, they desired a modest and speedy funeral, and being poor they wanted it to be cheaply conducted.

This was agreed to, and Mr. Stillwell had the body of the infant taken to his undertaking establishment, on the Neck Road, in the town of Gravesend, Saturday afternoon, when the mother and sister met with others to accompany the body to the Gravesend cemetery, where it was to be interred. The mother expressed a wish that a clergyman might be secured to conduct  a burial service over the body of the baby. There was no clergyman to be got handily, and Mr. Stillwell so told her. Her grief at this statement affected him, and then he proposed that the ceremony be performed by phonograph. The mother immediately agreed to it.

Mr. Stillwell is an expert in the management of the phonograph, and placed the records already made in their proper order, as the weeping relatives and friends gathered around the coffin containing the remains of their dear one.

First the Lord’s Prayer was rendered with a solemn emphasis that took away all the suggestion of mechanical effect. It impressed the mourners. Then a record by the Mozart quartet of the hymn, ‘Nearer My God to Thee,’ was given on another cup and after that the verses of the Scripture usually given at funerals and beginning with the words, ‘Man, who is born of woman,’ etc., were rendered with full emphasis. Then a solo, ‘The Sweet Bye and Bye,’ recorded by Miss Loreen Williamson of Gravesend was repeated. The closing portion was the committal service used by the Reformed Church denomination. The remains were then conveyed to the town cemetery, where they were interred without further ceremonies.

Mr. Stillwell, when spoken to on the matter last night, said he was entirely satisfied with the result. He said:

‘It was a solemn, if a novel scene. I confess I felt a degree of trepidation when the service began, but when the inanimate machine, with its whirring accompaniment, began the solemn words, they seemed invested with a feeling of comfort, and touched everyone present.'”

"Frequently the reptile climbed up into her throat."

Vital news about a lizard-related death in Pennsylvania arrived at the offices of the Brooklyn Daily Eagle in 1900, and those newshounds wasted no time in using it to fill space in the paper’s July 24 edition. An excerpt:

“Philadelphia–Some time ago Mrs. Anna M. Jones of Marcus Hook, Pa., accidentally swallowed a lizard while drinking water. Frequently the reptile climbed up into her throat, but at all times successfully resisted all attempts at ejectment.

Mrs. Jones was a prey to the constant fear that in one of these excursions of the lizard she would be choked to death. Last night after complaining of a choking sensation, she suddenly expired. It is believed that her dread of an imminent violent death had a fatal effect upon her heart as there is no evidence of strangulation.”

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"He tried every method imaginable to kill the turtle."

You would imagine by virtue of their profession that taxidermists lead unusual lives, but 19th-century practitioners of this profession had especially turbulent existences. A peek into their world, courtesy of several articles from the Brooklyn Daily Eagle.

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“Tenacity of the Turtle” (September 15, 1899): “H.R. Dill, the Gardiner taxidermist who recently received a large hook bill turtle to be mounted from the game commissioners, was surprised when he commenced work on the shelled monster to find that he was alive. He tried every method imaginable to kill the turtle, but was unsuccessful until he removed its heart and placed it upon the table. In this position and pinned to the table by a knife, this organ pulsated regularly for three hours before it died.”

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“Heart Disease or Suicide”  (January 11, 1893): “William J. Kampfmueller, a taxidermist of 365 Broadway died suddenly at his home, 303 Hewes Street. His friends say that he died of heart disease, but neighbors whisper about suicide.

A month ago one of Mr. Kampfmueller’s clerks absconded with a large sum of money, and ever since the taxidermist, who was 52 years old, had been very despondent as it crippled him considerably in his business. He was seen about the place yesterday morning and was in good health. The family says that he died of natural causes and indignantly deny the theory of suicide.”

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"Cats are more frequently stuffed than any other kind of animals."

“Taxidermy and Its Profits” (August 14, 1887): “A few blocks distant from the bird fancier’s is the shop of a taxidermist. Its owner, a little old man with a very bald head, received the reporter cautiously. He said: ‘This is the best time of the year for my business. In the Spring and Summer many handsome birds are shot. These are often brought to me to stuff. Cats are more frequently stuffed than any other kind of animals. I get $5 for stuffing one, where formerly I received triple that amount. While many taxidermists use straw, I prefer cotton. Hair is sometimes used, but it is too expensive. It costs $1 to stuff a parrot. Smaller birds cost less.'”

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“Taxidermist Fails” (August 13, 1900): “Corpus Christi, Tex.–Professor G.W. Knott, as an Englishman, employed by the British Museum as a taxidermist in Texas and Mexico, was drowned Sunday night in the bay here. Knott was landed at the Central Wharf in a yawl boat from the schooner Reliable, which brought him from Mustang Island, near this city, where he had been engaged for several months securing the specimens of all kinds of water fowl. When he landed on the wharf the professor was somewhat under the influence of liquor and fell backward into the water, drowning before he could be rescued. Professor Knott was one of the most expert taxidermists in the world.”

"Upon the first fire Cochrane was shot in the forehead--the ball ripping up a portion of his skull, and scattering a teaspoon full of the brain."

The most famous duel in American history was the Aaron Burr-Alexander Hamilton tragedy that played out in Weehawken, New Jersey, in 1804. But plenty of other gun-and-sword battles occurred in this country in the 19th century. The following are several stories about duels that appeared in the Brooklyn Daily Eagle.

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“Duel Near Washington” (February 19, 1844) “A duel was fought near Washington on Friday last, between a couple of young men named Julian May, a lawyer and student of medicine, and Joseph Cochrane, brother to John F. Cochrane, Esq., of the War Department. They fought with rifles, at fifty paces, and upon the first fire Cochrane was shot in the forehead–the ball ripping up a portion of his skull, and scattering a teaspoon full of the brain. The wound is considered mortal. The quarrel originated in a billiard room, between friends of the parties, and ultimately led to a discussion touching their bravery. Until dueling shall be branded and punished as murder, we must expect to hear of such brutalities.”

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"One received a sword thrust through the breast."

“Fought A Duel With Swords” (December 17, 1886): “Chicago–A duel with swords was fought early yesterday morning in Humboldt Park. A little before 7 o’clock closed carriages entered the park, each carriage contained a principal, with his second and a surgeon. They drove to the western end, where they alighted and concealed themselves behind a clump of trees. The arrangements being completed, the principals each drew a saber and the contest began. Soon both were wounded. One received a sword thrust through the breast and his opponent was cut across the face. 

With the drawing of blood the duelists seemed satisfied, for they were quickly put in their carriages, and rapidly driven to Frerksen’s drug store, at the corner of North and California Avenues. There the wounds were dressed. Then the men were carried to their carriages and rapidly driven away. So quickly was the duel fought that the park policeman who saw the carriages go out of the park was not aware of what had occurred, nor were several people who saw them drive up to the drug store and away again. The only witnesses of the duel besides those immediately interested were some boys who were skating in the park. The boys say one of the men was large and fully bearded, with a military bearing. The other was younger. Mr. Frerksen, the druggist, was very reticent about the matter, though he admitted that a duel had been fought and that the participants were the editor of a pharmaceutical journal and a young medical man. It is said the affair was over the hand and favor of a young lady.”

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“Duel Between Father And Son” (December 11, 1890): “Gainesville, Tex.–A fatal duel took place last night in Paine’s Valley between Senator Samuel Paul, of the Chicasaw legislature, and his son, Joe Paul, in which Joe received a bullet wound to the back and one in the breast, and the father received a dangerous wound in the thigh, made by a pistol ball fired by the son. Reports from Paine’s Valley state that the young man died of his wounds this evening, but that the father will recover. It is said that the difficulty grew out of a quarrel over a woman of bad repute. Deputy Marshal Thomas left Gainesville this evening to place the senator under arrest and take him before a United States commissioner for preliminary trial.”

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Horse trainers in the nineteenth century would try to win races by hook or by crook, even if it involved giving cocaine to their steeds or attaching electric currents to spurs and saddles. An inside look at the tricks of the trade was provided by an article in the December 18, 1900 edition of the Brooklyn Daily Eagle. An excerpt:

“The use of drugs, opiates or mechanical appliances to accelerate or deaden the speed of horses has been a common practice on our race tracks for many years, but in England these practices were totally unknown until the advent of the American trainer, who brought with him the modern methods. So, it is little wonder that our English cousins threw up their hands in amazement when they saw the sudden improvement worked by the mysterious methods of the Yankees. Ordinary selling platers of the commonest types became good handicap horses, while those of the latter division suddenly blossomed forth as stake horses. For a time they marveled. Then they began to suspect that the sudden improvement was due to other than ordinary training methods. While admitting that the superiority of the American style of riding had some bearing on this change of form, the Englishmen could not comprehend how horses purchased at a small price–horses which had never shown enough speed to get out of their own way–in the hands of the American trainers, developed wonderful speed, while these same horses, when sold by the shrewd Americans for a fancy price, as rapidly deteriorated to their pristine form and became utterly unable to win purses.

It is related that one inquisitive English trainer asked Lester Rieff one day at Newmarket what Wishard gave his horses to cause them to break away from the post so quickly and get into their stride at the very beginning of the race. ‘Feed them on pineapples,’ replied the jockey, confidingly. The trainer at once put his horses on a pineapple diet, with the result that he very nearly ruined his whole string.

The prevailing opinion that it is necessary for a jockey to pull his horse in order to lose a race is an entirely erroneous one. To the astute trainer there are a legion of ways by which he can increase or diminish the speed of a horse, and that without fear of detection. Ever since the shrewd American trainer began to cast about him for means by which he might gain an advantage over his rivals, the use of electricity has played an important part. The first known use of an electric battery in racing was with a mare named Marie Lovell, at the Gloucester track, over a decade ago. The battery used was the invention of a man named Tobin and was a rather primitive affair. It consisted of a leather belt, strapped around the jockey’s body, next to the skin, and containing eight cells, four on a side, and located under the armpits. Insulated wires ran down the inside of the boot and connected with the spurs. The horse above mentioned was at long price in the betting and won easily, to the great surprise of all those who were not in the game. 

This battery was operated throughout the season without detection, one of its greatest successes being pulled off on the mare Gyda, at Guttenberg. This horse was at 100 to 1 in the betting and won handily. Before the race, the report was circulated that Gyda had run away, collided with an ice wagon and injured herself badly. In consequence of this report, and despite some desultory play on the mare, her price remained at the same high figure. The promoters of the scheme cleaned up at a fat winning on her race.

There were soon many improvements on the old body battery, the saddle battery attaining the most success. In this, the cells were concealed in the under part of the saddle. The wires ran down the stirrup leathers and connected with the stirrup irons. A steel plate, under the instep of the jockey, made the connection with the spurs. From this style of battery a very powerful flow of electricity could be obtained and it proved particularly magical in its effect on sulkers.

Another form of electric battery was concealed in the boot; another in the pockets, where the lead pads were kept, while still another was held in the hand and thrown away after the jockey had won the race and before he returned to the scales. Then there was the whip battery, which caused the horses to swerve badly, and was never a success.

After a time, it became extremely difficult to use an electric apparatus without fear of detection. The use of drugs, either hypodermically injected into the veins or else administered in a capsule, then came in vogue. Cocaine and other stimulating drugs were used and drenching, which consists of giving a horse exhilarating and courage-increasing drugs in a liquid form, also came into practice. On the outlaw tracks fully one-half the horses became ‘dope’ horses.”

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Horse racing in 1897 at Sheepshead Bay, Brooklyn:

"Dr. W.H. Shoemaker, a talented and leading physician of this city, has been declared insane owing to have become a vicitm to the cocaine habit."

Cocaine, for a brief time, was a popular 19th-century anesthetic and treatment for minor illnesses, before people realized it was highly addictive. Physicians who had easy access to the drug often became hooked on it, as the following stories from the Brooklyn Daily Eagle demonstrate.

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“He Operated on Himself” (May 15, 1889): “Birmingham, Ala.–Dr. W.H. Shoemaker, a talented and leading physician of this city, has been declared insane owing to have become a victim to the cocaine habit. While under the influence of the drug he in December last performed upon himself probably the most unique and most remarkable surgical operation ever recorded. He had been a sufferer for some time from a tumor on his liver. One night while he was alone he took his surgical instruments and deliberately cut into the abdominal cavity, cut the tumor from his liver, sewed the incision up, showed the tumor next morning to his brother physicians and has since entirely recovered. His use of cocaine previous to the operation became habitual.”

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“He Gave Cocaine Recklessly” (February 25, 1893): “Jackson, Mich.–A local physician, himself a confirmed taker of cocaine, has brought many of his patients under its influence. Reputable medical men have determined that the practice must stop and that the practitioner himself be put under treatment or be debarred from practice. Some of the best class of citizens are addicted to the habit, and the local press publishes a list of hundreds. The majority of the victims became addicted to cocaine before knowing what they were taking, it having been administered for throat troubles, hay fever and many minor ills.”

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“Started a Fire in His Room” (December 17, 1896): “Crazed by the use of morphine, cocaine and whisky, Dr, Floyd Lamott Danforth, a dentist, with offices at East One Hundred and Twenty-fifth Street, New York, piled his effects in the center of the floor of his apartments early this morning and set fire to them. He then went out and told the police. The fire was extinguished before any material damage was done and the unfortunate man was taken to the East One Hundred and Twenty-fifth street station and locked up.”

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"Dr. Manaton is addicted to the use of cocaine." (Image by Anssi Pulkkinen.)

“Cocaine Made Him Crazy” (January 6, 1894): “Greenport, L.I.–The monotony of life in Greenport during the season was broken last night and the whole town was thrown into a fever of excitement by the antics of a crazy physician armed with an axe. The unfortunate is Dr. Manaton, who, associated with Dr. Wilson, has been practicing in Greenport since his removal from Brooklyn last summer.

Dr. Manaton is addicted to the use of cocaine. Last night he took an overdose of the drug and became violently insane. He had just retired to his room and was but partially dressed when the attack came upon him. His sister and the servant had retired and they were aroused by a tremendous racket in the doctor’s apartment. They realized that the windows were being shattered and the furniture being smashed and suspected the cause. The women locked themselves in the room and the work of destruction went on. They heard the doctor go down stairs and out into the yard. When he returned Miss Manaton peeped out of the door and saw that her brother had armed himself with an axe and with it he commenced to chop away the stair railing. The frenzied man caught sight of his sister through the partly open door and made a rush for her with the uplifted axe. She closed and locked the door and before he succeeded in breaking it in with the axe the two women escaped through a door into an adjoining room and made their way out of the house clad only in their night clothes.”

"The gallant ventriloquist thereupon assaulted the remonstrating husband."

There was perhaps no bigger reprobate in 1880s New York than the ventriloquist, as the following reports published in the Brooklyn Daily Eagle demonstrate.

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“A Gallant Ventriloquist” (July 20, 1886): “Charles Young, a ventriloquist, who earns a living by exhibiting his acquirement at the West End, Coney Island, was arraigned before Justice Newtown there yesterday afternoon, on complaint of John Dunn, a cottager on the Island, who accused him of assault. Dunn told the Justice that Young had been out walking with his wife and when they returned home Dunn told Young that he should not be so free with another man’s wife. The gallant ventriloquist thereupon assaulted the remonstrating husband, who had him arrested. Young denied the charge and said he had a thousand young ladies to go out with, without taking another man’s wife. He was placed in $200 bonds to answer.”

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"A large crowd of people were attracted to the cemetery and they all concluded it was a ghost." (Image by Sukanto Debnath.)

“It Was Not a Ghost” (September 23, 1887): “Frederick Schmidt, of Middle Village, is an accomplished ventriloquist. On Tuesday night, about midnight, he secreted himself in the Lutheran Cemetery, on the outskirts of the village, and began to shriek ‘Murder! Murder! Oh, spare my life!’ at the top of a lofty falsetto voice. Justice Louis P. Knickmann and a large crowd of people were attracted to the cemetery and they all concluded it was a ghost. The justice chased the voice, but could not locate the specter and his hair stood on end along with the hair on the head of everybody present. Finally the voice seemed to hover over the crowd and then the justice and the crowd broke for Middle Village on a dead run. The justice cleared a fence six feet high surrounding the cemetery and was not aware of the fact until reminded of it two hours afterward by one who had observed the feat with astonishment. The justice is a large man. Mr. Schmidt has been smiling ever since.”

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“Harry Kennedy Assaulted” (August 18, 1886): “Harry Kennedy, the ventriloquist and saloon keeper, met a few friends in a saloon at the Willink entrance to Prospect Park last night. He became involved in a dispute with a stranger and they clinched. Kennedy was thrown on his back, and the stranger kicked him about the face and body. His friends could not interfere, as they were under the influence of liquor. The strange man escaped from the room, and as no one knows him he will probably never be captured. Kennedy was taken in a carriage to his Coney Island saloon and is confined to his bed. His face is cut in several places and his body is covered in bruises.”

"Of course, Tiny was no account against a rat."

A vital report of national importance, the following account of a very puny dog ran in the December 6, 1885 Brooklyn Daily Eagle. An excerpt:

“Tiny, a black and tan terrier, has the honor of having been the smallest full grown dog that ever lived. He belonged to Lieutenant General Sir Archibald Maclaine of England, and in honor of his extreme tininess, is now carefully preserved under a glass case. Tiny was less than four inches long, and could comfortably curl up and take a nap in a common glass tumbler. An ordinary finger ring was large enough for his collar, and when he sat up, a baby’s hand would almost have made a broad and safe resting place for him. Of course, Tiny was no account against a rat. Indeed, a hearty, self-respecting mouse would have stood its ground against the little fellow. But if Tiny had not strength, he did have courage, and would bark as lustily as his little lungs would let him at the biggest rat that ever lived–when the rat was dead.

To tell the whole truth, Tiny was remarkable and he was famous, but he was not very happy. He could have almost anything he wished to eat, but he had no appetite. He shivered most of the time, even though he was usually hidden in warm wraps. Of course, he caught cold easily, and then, oh, dear, how pitifully he did sneeze.”

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"When he went to the second story window the young man offered him whisky soaked bread."

This story about a soused monkey originally ran in the Louisville Courier-Journal and was reprinted in the August 2, 1901 Brooklyn Daily Eagle. An excerpt:

“The unusual spectacle of an intoxicated monkey, gaudily dressed in red and gold, throwing nickels and pennies at a crowd of children almost resulted in a tragedy on Chestnut Street the other morning.

The monkey was more intelligent than most of his race. He wasn’t young and his queer behavior could not be attributed to his inexperience. Of course, he was the property of an organ grinder. Up beyond First Street, the ‘musician’ stopped and ground out ‘I’d Leave My Happy House for You,’ always a favorite with the neighborhood students.

At a second story window, the little beast saw a young man standing. The stranger beckoned and the monkey quickly climbed to him. The window was opened and the little climber disappeared within. Five minutes later he climbed down the lightning rod. After that the whole monkey family would have been scandalized could they have witnessed his actions. For a block he was unruly. Then he began to separate himself from the money which he had collected . Nickels flew in every direction.

But the animal kept on jabbering. It was not his fault that he was drunk. When he went to the second story window the young man offered him whisky soaked bread and the animal ate heartily.”

"A relative ran into the woodshed after a saw, and began to deliberately saw off about eight inches of the dead man's legs."

Ordering the wrong size coffin is certainly a problem, but some geniuses in Milwaukee managed to make a bad situation worse when burying a very tall former Civil War soldier. An excerpt from a Milwaukee Journal Sentinel story that was reprinted in the June 22, 1884 Brooklyn Daily Eagle:

“Several farmers of Oak Creek, who brought produce to the south side yesterday brought intelligence of a strange burial, which occurred there last Friday. Horace Baldwin died last week of consumption and the funeral was set for Friday. He was a farmer residing on the division line of the towns of Oak Creek and Lake, owning some thirty acres of land, and was in comparatively good circumstances. When the civil war broke out he joined Company K, Twenty-fourth Wisconsin Regiment, known as the Oak Creek Company, because so many natives of Oak Creek were in it. Although but twenty years of age, he was remarkably tall, his army description making him 6 feet 7 inches tall. When his comrades were wounded in the breast he would stop the bullets with his stomach. He was so conspicuously tall that he was given a sobriquet appropriate to his stature. He could not stand army life very well, and soon gave it up. The disease of which he died was contracted in the army. Friday, when the neighbors gathered at the farm house to do honor to his memory by following the remains to the grave, it was found that the coffin was made for a six-footer, and was therefore seven inches too short. The corpse could not be squeezed into the casket, and so, rather than disappoint the people waiting outside, a relative ran into the woodshed after a saw, and began to deliberately saw off about eight inches of the dead man’s legs. He thought the corpse moved and fainted. Thereupon another relative seized the woodsaw and completed the shortening process. The several members were bent back, the coffin lid fastened, and the funeral cortege wended its way to the Oak Creek Cemetery. The story has created a great sensation in Oak Creek, where the act is generally condemned, and a mobbing party was talked of. Luke Scanlan, supervisor from the town, says the story is true. Supervisor Kuenzil also vouches for the truth of the story. He says he has it from a source of undoubted authority.”

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