Ideas and technology and politics and journalism and history and humor and some other stuff.
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10 search-engine keyphrases bringing traffic to Afflictor this week:
This Thanksgiving, it was heartening to see one bird escape the turkey farm and make it to the safety of the highway.
Oh, no…TRUCK!!!
That pardon isn’t for free. We need you to work with us.
President Obama continued a Thanksgiving tradition today when he pardoned two turkeys, Paulie and Frankie. In order to secure the pardons, the brothers agreed to help the Feds bring down their family’s racketeering operation. Paulie turned state’s evidence and Frankie wore a wire. They tried to play it cool, but word leaked that they’d flipped, so they had to be taken out. You know how it is when you go against the family, boys. It’s nothing personal, only business.
A bullet in the neck for you, Paulie.
You lived like scum, Frankie, and you died like it.
Paulie (2014-2014).
Frankie (2014-2014).
America (1776-2014).
I promise I’ll never re-watch Goodfellas during a holiday week again. Remember, kids: Crime doesn’t pay, except for most types of white-collar crime.
And thanks to everyone who prepared my vegan Thanksgiving dinner…
…and dessert. Delicious!
Happy Thanksgiving, U.S. Afflictor readers!
Have a few people i want to sue. all cases are winners. all parties really need to get sued and have assets and cash we can go after. In the wrong in a few business deals and want to get what’s owed me the right way. I have lawyer friends but none are ruthless enough for me. honestly i love saving the constitution, giving away legal aid to people who are unfairly prosecuted and or wrongfully arrested or helping people get patents, but i want a killer on my team.
So I’m into alternative art. I collect bones and skulls, and also taxidermy in decent condition. If you have bones you want to get rid of or sell, I’ll take them. I will not accept food item bones, in example chicken, turkey, etc. Cows and pigs bones I will take if not cut up or clearly from a cooked meal. I will also take bones that are not cleaned off as I have the means to process and clean them myself, but any bones with meat remaining will need to be double bagged for sanitary reasons. All items will need to be photographed before any arrangement is made. I’m not loaded, so don’t think you can try to get $100 for a pig skull. I am willing to pay around 10-20 per skull, varying by species and condition. I WILL NOT ACCEPT BONES FROM ANIMALS THAT WERE KILLED FOR THE PURPOSE OF HARVESTING THEIR BONES TO SELL. I am open to dealing with hunters and butchers trying to dispose of their skeletal waste items, I love pig, cow and deer bones and skulls. Roadkill is fine, but I will take dirty bones, not rotting corpses. All bones taken from nature must be double bagged for sanitary reasons.
10 recent search-engine keyphrases bringing traffic to Afflictor this week:
This week, it became clear which dessert won’t be popular this Thanksgiving.
They brought “guests” in. And they wanted Irish Car Bombs, so I did it. I took one, too. Then I needed a cig right away. Here I go…outside and smoked with them.
I’ve come to the realization that I can’t function unless I’m stoned.
And here’s another secret, cock is overrated.
Who needs some horny dickwad trying to fuck you while you’re trying to lure a little kitten into your lair?
Whatever.
anyone know of a place where i could purchase insects for cooking? pet shops and graveyards are excluded.
10 search-engine keyphrases bringing traffic to Afflictor this week:
This week, ISIS announced it plans to print its own currency, which will allow the terrorist organization to honor the man who made its rise possible.
I am a IVF patient in PA who bought six frozen donor eggs from a reputable agency. I no longer need them as I became pregnant on my own. I invested over $15,000 in them and would sell them for much less. They are safely stored at my doctor’s clinic in Newark, DE but I can ship them to your clinic at any time. I have all of the donor information (Caucasian, blue eyes, brown hair, health info etc.) and will provide copies of the signed contract for their purchase. I hope someone can use them for an IVF cycle. If you are interested, please feel free to contact me. Thank you and good luck with your IVF journey.
“Caucasian, blue eyes, brown hair.”
First, let’s define the needy co-worker. The needy co-worker wants you to do your job so they don’t have to, yet they get upset if you don’t spend your day babysitting them. You must listen to them while they sigh about their pathetic lives. You must listen to them talk about their kids. You must tell them if you’re going to dress up for Halloween all while doing your work or else you’re not part of the team. You must listen to them talk high, whisper and enter your space.
How to deal with taking care of babies at work:
Hope this helps someone. Good luck.
Mummified RAT for sale.
Today ONLY! $40 or highest offer.
First come first serve.
10 recent search-engine keyphrases bringing traffic to Afflictor this week:
Pepsi just acknowledged it secretly tested Doritos-flavored Mountain Dew on unwitting subjects, which counts as the second most unpleasant meal of the week.
It’s too complicated to explain why, but I need a photo of a black Combat roach bait trap in someone’s home, and ideally the shot shows a bit of their apartment so I can tell what part of the home the trap is in.
I searched online but all I found were images of the traps themselves or the packaging. But I need a photo of an actual trap in someone’s home.
Thanks!!
“I want to fuck Blanche.”
I’m a happily married man who loves his wife and never cheats. She’s still hot to me and looks better everyday. Here’s the thing: I find myself sexually attracted to 98% of the women I see, wherever I may be. Whether it’s hot women who work out to women over 300 lbs, I get hard just looking at them. Any race too. Age doesn’t matter either. I watch Golden Girls simply because I want to fuck Blanche. I never give in to temptation, in fact I usually take this horniess home and make love to the Mrs. But even with us having sex 4 times a week, I still masturbate at least three times a day. Even awkwardly shaped women are conjuring up orgasms. Some of the women most people think dress inappropriately are the ones that turn me on the most. I know this isn’t normal. Am I just a sex addict?
“I’m going to smoke a joint and watch Harry Potter movies and try to forget.”
I’ll be blatantly honest:
I’m losing hope fast and consequently, I’m becoming dangerously depressed. I’m a smart girl though, so instead of taking some impulsive action, I’m analyzing. I hate analyzing…talk about adding unnecessary frustration to the mix!
The system sucks but when so many people believe in the system…believe in it as the only possible system and all change must happen within it…how do you fight it?
How do you fight when you’re not a fighter?
I have no interest in the system. None. But I have no idea how to live outside of it…coming from a family of top notch assimilators, it’s all I know how to do and yet it’s killing me. I hate being fake.
All I want is to be happy. To live in and contribute to a happy society. A balanced society.
One without pigeons would be awesome…
…I’m going to smoke a joint and watch Harry Potter movies and try to forget that I actually wrote this and posted it…life is seriously starting to suck though.
10 search-engine keyphrases bringing traffic to Afflictor this week:
This week, Halloween brought us some scary faces. But next week may present us with the scariest face of all.
