Donald Trump: A dictionary couldn’t hurt.
When he’s not busy vomiting blood from his ass onto kittens until the kittens drown in his ass-blood, Donald Trump is misusing basic words from the English language. That’s because he’s arrogant, ignorant, completely lacking in self-awareness and unable to read anything longer than a quotation. Some examples.
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The Word: DISMAL
Comic @sethmeyers21 bombed at University of Texas at Arlington—crowd was dismal as was his performance—I told you so!
Afflictor:
- “An Evening With Seth Meyers”
- SOLD OUT—The Seth Meyers Maverick Speakers Series lecture is sold out.
Amazing – @CelebApprentice’s record 13th season is right on schedule. Must be the ‘All Star’ cast.
Afflictor: Other TV shows have been on for much longer than 13 years, so that’s not a record. Other reality shows have also had a longer run. So, Celebrity Apprentice has set a “record” for the most seasons of Celebrity Apprentice. Congratulations all around!
@nbcnightlynews (Brian Williams, anyone?) says women warriors are “every bit as tough as the guys.” Just think about that statement!
Afflictor: It’s difficult to tell what dum-dum means here, but he seems to be saying that it’s foolish to believe female soldiers are as tough as their male counterparts. Considering Donald Trump’s history of sexism, that’s not a big leap to make. Anyone, male or female, who completes basic training and serves in Iraq or Afghanistan is tough as nails, not only physically but mentally as well. And every member of our military is far tougher than a bloated armchair general like Donald Trump, who likes to threaten other countries from the safety of his Twitter account, knowing he and his children will never have to defend the country.
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The Word: PIGSTY
Michael Forbes lives in a pigsty and bad liquor company Glenfiddich gave him Scot of the Year award…
Afflictor: I’m actually going to stand up for Donald Trump here. He does know what the word “pigsty” means. He knows when something stinks.
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The Word: HOT
When you’re “hot” the lowlifes really shoot at you… and they try hitting from every angle! Never let the bastards get you down.
Afflictor: For a second, the quotation marks gave me hope, but that’s just Donald Trump misusing punctuation. He actually thinks that being a racist buffoon who has devolved into a freak-show attraction makes him admired instead of sad and pathetic. If you take a dump on the sidewalk, people will look, but you probably shouldn’t be proud of the attention.
Joseph Stalin: I was hot, so people said stuff about me.
Pol Pot: My Q rating was through the roof. Others were jealous.
Idi Amin: I was on a roll. My fans know the truth.
Tags: Brian Williams, Donald Trump, Donald Trump Is A Moron, Michael Forbes, Seth Meyers