Space school was a drag. You couldn’t wear pretty dresses and all the other girls and guys were so serious. Astronaut Barbie was bummed. But that discotheque in Cocoa Beach was great. Everyone looked so cool. That pill was a lot like Ecstasy, but it wasn’t exactly Ecstasy. The next day, Barbie bought some Addy and crammed for exams. The proctor was totally cute. But the actual flight was too confusing. All those controls on the dash. No way anyone could remember everything. All aboard were burned alive. A nation mourns.

See also:

• Skipper has lupus just like Flannery O’Connor.