"Morrissey was in the midst of the fight and regretted his Darwinian expression."

A body couldn’t walk down the street in the 1880s and 1890s without some sharp tongue cracking wise. Insulting remarks were a part of life, but they weren’t always tolerated, as the following quartet of brief stories from the Brooklyn Daily Eagle illustrates.

••••••••••

“Remarks Too Personal” (August 22, 1899): “Philip Reilly, a bartender at 63 Columbus street, and living at 143 Baltic street, was charged with assault this morning in the Butler street court. A man named Morrissey went last evening into the saloon where Reilly is employed and in the course of an argument incidentally made the remark to the bartender that he (Morrissey) had a monkey at home that was a better looking creature than Reilly. Now while it is true that bartenders have and are expected to put up with a great deal from patrons, this was too much for Reilly. There was a running jump and a high leap across the bar and the next thing the people in the place knew there was moaning. Morrissey was in the midst of the fight and regretted his Darwinian expression. Reilly, it is said, gave him a lesson in manners which he will not soon forget. When Morrissey had explained to Magistrate Brenner this morning about how the trouble arose, the court seemed to think that Reilly was not altogether to blame and discharged him.”

••••••••••

“Martin Pelz Horsewhipped by Mrs. Frank Ebert” (July 7, 1896): “Martin Pelz of Fort Hamilton was soundly horsewhipped by Mrs. Frank Ebert of 183 Twelfth street, Brooklyn, yesterday, on the corner of Ninety-fifth street and Fifth avenue. Mr. Ebert, the husband, pinioned Pelz’s arms and held him fast while the infuriated woman rained the blows thick and fast. For fully five minutes Pelz was compelled to stand the punishment and though he struggled, he could not get free from the clutches of the husband. Though a crowd gathered no attempt was made to stop the woman. Mrs. Ebert said very little while inflicting the punishment and when she got tired and had satisfaction for her injured feelings, both she and her husband bounded on a Nassau car and rode away. Later in the day they were arrested on a warrant issued by Justice Rhodes and both were in court this morning.

Mr. Pelz lives on Ninety-fifth street, between Fort Hamilton and Fifth avenues, and he has for a neighbor Mrs. McCarthy. It appears on Sunday Mrs. Ebert visited Mrs. McCarthy’s place, but did not find her at home. Miss Mary McCarthy, a daughter, was in, and both she and Mrs. Ebert made a friendly visit to the Pelz household. In the evening Mrs. Pelz visited Mrs. McCarthy and told her not to take Mrs. Ebert to her house again, as her husband did not consider her a fit associate for his wife. Mrs. McCarthy lost no time is communicating what she heard, and the horsewhipping yesterday was the outcome.”

•••••••••••

"He was scalded on several portions of his body."

“A Quick Cure By the Water Method” (August 22, 1884): “Late last night Timothy Crosby made some insulting remarks to his landlady, Mrs. Hogan, of No. 100 John street. As Timothy persisted in his annoying behavior she tried the effect of the water cure on him. Picking up a saucepan of boiling water she threw the whole contents of it over him, and this heroic treatment had the desired result. He was scalded on several portions of his body and was removed to the Homeopathic Hospital. He refused to make any complaint against Mrs. Hogan.”

••••••••••

“The Red Headed Girl Will Surely Turn” (March 10, 1889): “This morning is police court four young men, named Samuel Allen, Joseph Derry, Mark Ashford and Martin Derry, were charged by Miss Hannah Hartnett with making rude and insulting remarks in her hearing. Miss Hannah is a good looking young lady, but her auburn hair has proved to be the source of much annoyance to her. She found it almost impossible to go on the street unless she was insulted by boys on the corners asking, ‘Where’s the white horse?’ and making other rude remarks. She stood it as long as she could, and then had the above named defendants arrested. They were fined $5 each.”