I am late hockey goalie George Hainsworth. In addition to playing for the Montreal Canadiens, I was also a net minder for the Saskatoon Sheiks.

I knew the second I put up a post that mentioned hockey that Afflictor.com would have its first visitor from the incredibly cold and underpopulated nation of Canada. But, you know, what took you guys so long? You’re sitting right up north there and many other far-flung countries have already joined Afflictor Nation. Too busy counting your 26 Olympic medals? That’s 11 fewer than the USA won, so it shouldn’t have taken you that long, Canada. Well, thanks for taking a break from curling and pretending you’re proud of Celine Dion long enough to throw us a bone. Better late than never, Canada. We welcome you to Afflictor Nation!