Decoder: Jon Voight’s Letter To President Obama

April 14, 2010 in Humor, Politics | Permalink

Angelina is starting to seem relatively well-adjusted. (Photo by Kristin Dos Santos.)

Jon Voight: Every loving American for peace and truth and the security of our nation must come out and join the Tea Parties in their states.

Decoder: Or they could stay home and watch the 2004 family comedy Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2 on DVD. I play “Kane” and Scott Baio does some of his finest work yet.

Jon Voight: President Obama uses his aggression and arrogance for his own agenda, against the will of the American people when he should be using his will and aggression against our enemies.

Decoder: Al Qaeda and the Taliban might disagree.

Jon Voight: To think that this once great nation will be a third world country.

Decoder: A third-world country with iPads, frappacinos and high-speed internet access.

Jon Voight: Now the lie goes very deep and President Obama has been cleverly trained in the Alinsky method and it would be very important that every American knows what that method is. It is a socialistic, Marxist teaching and with it, little by little, he rapes this nation.

Decoder: Though I might be confusing him with Ben Roethlisberger. I know the charges were dropped, but when two different women have accused you of rape, wow, what’s going on there, Ben?

Jon Voight: The world looked up to us as a symbol of hope and prosperity now wonders what will become of the entire world if America is losing its power.

Decoder: Actually, people around the world have a much higher opinion of America since Obama became President. And applications for citizenship don’t seem to be down.

Jon Voight: The American people who understand exactly what is taking place have come together in the thousands, vowing to try to stay together as a unit of love and freedom for all men and women, from all walks of life.

Decoder: But really only some white people with a shaky grasp of history and the innate ability to blame their problems and insecurities on others.

Jon Voight: The opposition will continue their tactics.

Decoder: Running for office in free elections, thinking they should be able to govern if they get the most votes.

Jon Voight: They will lie and plant their own bullies amongst us.

Decoder: Strangely, those bullies will fit in seamlessly with many actual Tea Party members.

Jon Voight: Let us all stay in God’s light.

Decoder: Though you should remember to wear sunblock and a hat if you’re going to stay in God’s light for longer than 20 minutes. Sure, your body needs to produce Vitamin D, but you don’t want skin cancer, either.

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